Communicate

GUYS. FEELINGS RIGHT NOW.

Ok, I've heard so many situations with my friends recently about problems in their relationships that all stem from the same exact problem: COMMUNICATION. People!!! TALK to each other!!! Why is this so difficult?!?!? Rant over, logic time...

I've always been a really open person, as you've definitely figured out by now if you've read any of my previous posts. (Literally, ANY of the previous posts. I'm an open gal ok?) So, it's really easy for me to communicate with people when I have feelings, especially if I'm even remotely close to them. Sometimes it's even easy for me to open up to complete strangers. So sure, maybe I'm an anomaly. However. Communication about my feelings and thoughts and experiences has always brought me a positive end result. I've never told somebody how I felt and regretted it afterward (or at least not for long if I did at all). For instance...

J. and I took hardly any time to start opening up to each other about small things. And our relationship was good like that. But once we really got comfortable with each other and started talking more and more about our feelings, our relationship grew into this amazing wonderful and close knit thing that we never could have achieved without talking. Telling J. how I feel now seems second nature; he knows me as well (or more than) I know myself, and not telling him how I feel feels like I'm just lying to myself about the inevitable and obvious. For instance, last night we were talking about sex, and how maybe we were ready or not, and I felt weird about it. So of course, although this seems like the obvious situation, I said I felt like I needed to wait until the situation was a certain way and I was doing it for the right reasons, etc... And he totally listened, and heard me out, and (because we're on the same level 24/7) totally agreed with me. If I hadn't told him how I felt, I could have ended up telling him I was ready for something I'm really not, and could have really fucked up our relationship. The other night, with the whole Kyle situation: if I hadn't told J. exactly how I felt about the situation, how would he know that I wasn't purposefully unfaithful, or if I would ever be worthy of his trust again? Communication in our relationship isn't just second nature, but also totally healthy and necessary.

So I never ever understand why so many other people struggle to communicate. Can't people see that telling someone how you feel can only make the situation more clear and easy to deal with? Note, I never said better or worse- that changes constantly. But if everybody involved knows how everybody else feels and thinks, won't things just go more smoothly? Communication eliminates guess work and hurt feelings and assumptions and short-comings. It does so much healthy good work in relationships, and I don't see how people can't figure that out.

Ok, maybe some people have a lot of trouble telling people how they feel. I'm no psychologist so I don't know what kind of issues this stems from, but I know that I at least have told all my friends like this the same thing... "If you feel something, feel it all the way, and then sometimes, you don't even need to tell people what you're feeling with words."

If you feel something, feel it ALL the WAY.

We are made to be sentient and emotional and sympathetic, empathetic creatures. We are wasting our lives and purposes if we cease to find feeling and emotion and experience in the huge world we're given. We cannot simply ignore our potentials to feel all we have the ability to feel and be all that we have the ability to be.

Feel it all the way, and tell people. If you can't tell people, then the whole "all the way" part should do that job for you, anyway.

Please guys. Just talk to each other. Just try it. Let me know what happens?!

See you when I see you.
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